Update

Hello everyone,
Noticed it's been a few days so I thought I'd post some randomness. Here is some stream of consciousness writing.

What I've been up to:
Well, I told you all about Friday. That was fun. The next day I woke up early so I could study for my weekly logic test. Unfortunately, I made it to the library about 10 minutes late and I missed the study group. I sat there waiting for them, but they all went home since I wasn't there. So, I waited for about an hour. Luckily a girl in my ward was there for a study group too. We talked for about an hour and she missed her study group. It was a fun conversation. We discussed the following things:

How some names sound more masculine than others (names ending with a hard E sound are diminutive i.e. Danny, Timmy, Mikey, etc.)

How if you ever want to make fun of something someone says and make it sound stupid you just need to say, "yeah, that's cool, I think I saw that cross stitched on a pillow once."

It's really fun, you should try it. If anyone takes themself too seriously you use this tool as follows.....

Pompous person: "Clarity of mind means clarity of passion, too; this is why a great and clear mind loves ardently and sees distinctly what it loves"

You: yeah, I totally agree, I once saw that cross stitched on a pillow.

It doesn't matter how brilliant the previous statement is, or how much confidence the person said it with...if you make the cross stich comment their comment is destroyed.

Try it, tell your friends (and if you use this trick I guess I should specify...while you still have friends))

Anyway, it was a fun conversation. I never noticed it before but the girl has a very small and strange birthmark on her cheek. It is shaped like a heart. I always thought it was something she drew on her cheek, but it was natural. Pretty cool/weird.

Saturday afternoon I went to visit Garett's grave. It finally warmed up enough so they were able to pour the concrete. I sat there and just thought for a while. I really missed him that day. I usually don't think about how much I miss him, but every once in a while I just get overwhelmed and sorta fall apart with grief. It's sorta selfish of me actually. I miss him the most when I need him the most. Garett was one of the few people I could talk to and feel like I was better for the conversation...he could sort information so well, I could tell him what I was thinking, what I was worrying about, and he'd rationally and carefully walk through everything, process it, and give me advice that I could trust. He knew me so well, and when he helped me I knew he loved me.

That's such a rare friend. I haven't had another friend like him. This past Saturday I thought about how patient and helpful he was with me the first time I thought I was in love. Man that was a headache/heartache. I wasn't prepared for all the emotions I felt. I must have sounded like a broken record as I spoke out my frustration, indecision, pain, and I went back and forth between resenting the girl, loving the girl, missing her, never wanting to see her again, and wanting to spend every moment with her. I can only imagine I sounded like a whiny little cyclical sissy. But, Garett was an open ear. He knew how intense my feelings were, and how undeveloped and unrealistic they were (he'd been there before and he knew the silliness of teenage love)...but he listened as if what I was saying was important (and it was important to him because it was important to me). He helped me through that. Such an amazing friend. I wish I could have his advice now.

It's sorta sad. Every major step in my life he was there. He walked me through the decision to go on a mission, to go to BYU, to be active in the church. Right now is the first time I've had to make serious life changing decisions without him. I don't really have anyone else in my life that could fill his role. Saturday I was doing some serious life planning, and that's when I realized how empty that felt without Garett's help.

After a while I began to feel a little sorry for myself. I have so many people that seem to rely on me (I hope this doesn't sound like arrogance or bragging). On Saturday there were quite a few people that sought me out cause they wanted to talk through a few things. I am pretty sure I'm good at this because they all seemed a lot better after our discussion...and that made me miss Garettt...cause what I was able to do for them is what Garett (and pretty much no one else) could do for me.

What's even more frustrating is I received a phone call from the Stake President the same day and was given a new calling. I never will turn down a calling, but I've had this calling once before and it took a lot out of me. I really am tired right now, I don't know how much I have to give, but this calling will require me to give a lot of myself. Sometimes I wonder how much can rightfully be expected of me. I've always felt more comfortable being the teacher, or the counselor. I hate leadership, I always have.

Anyway, enough of that tangent.

So, after I visited Garett's grave I went to visit his family. I spent some time with them. They are a funny bunch. They are all really into video games. His kids seem to be doing pretty well. His oldest son is still as whacky as every. He walked up to me and said "you should be a male nurse." I have no idea where that came from. I asked him why and he said "you look like a male nurse." I asked what a male nurse looked like and then he said "I can beat anyone at Smash Brothers" (the video game).

Linda (Garett's wife) asked him again why I should be a male nurse, but all he would say for his reasoning is I look like one. She said "I think he looks like he could be whatever he wants" and then Garett's son said "he doesn't look like he could be a boxer." So, there you have it. I look like a male nurse, but not a boxer.

We all played a little Smash Brothers. It felt good to play that game again. I know this much, if I can't make it as a lawyer or a professor, I'm pretty sure I have a future as a professional gamer.

I asked if there was anything I could do (in the past they've needed little things fixed like setting up the internet router or moving something heavy), but they were doing okay, so I headed out to visit my friend Jason who was in town for the weekend.

It was really good to see him again.

One thing I noticed as he was leaving is how guys hug. It seems like there are three degrees of formality in guy hugs.

1) The shoulder lean: This hug is when you shake hands, then realize that you need to express more intimacy, so you both lean in with your right shoulder and your shoulders touch, then you pat the person on the back, usually once or twice, then disengage....and there you have it...male intimacy.

2) The traditional hug: This hug is when you just go straight for a traditional hug, you pat the person on the back twice (3 times if they're a good friend that you really miss) and then disengage.

3) The awkward hug: This hug is the hug where you hug traditionally, but there is no pat. You just hold the other person.

Now, for a little explanation of the third type of hug. My theory is this. When guys hug they don't want to get comfortable....cause that's intimacy. So, to make sure they're not overly comfortable, guys stay moving. What I mean is this. If two guys hug and they just hold it, they have to admit that they're enjoying the contact (because contact is the only thing going on). But if guys pat each other on the back they're doing something, they're active, they're not lost in the embrace...they're moving, they're shucking and jiving. So, by moving (in this case patting the other's back) the guys remove the tension inherent in heterosexual male/male contact. That's why the hug ends when the pats on the back end.

Just recently I tested this theory. I have a friend that was recently married (and for this reason I haven't seen him much lately). When I saw him after the few months of absence I gave him a hug. I didn't pat his back during this hug....and I still feel dirty.

So, guys please realize how important it is to hug other guys properly.

Here is a helpful cartoon I just found online explaining the proper way to hug category 1 style.

Well, I better get some lunch. I hope you're all doing well.