First off, I'm in a psych of gender class. They gave us a test meant to determine whether we have male or female brains. It was a really stupid test to be honest. If you're a nice person you come across as a female, if you're a mean person you're male.
Some questions go like this:
If you hurt someone's feelings do you say you're sorry?
If you say yes then you're more female, if you don't say sorry you're more male.
Stupid right?
Other questions were things like "I try try to include other people in my activities" (this is also a female question (or statement more accurately).
I answered all these questions in the positive so the test started to tell me I have a girl brain.
The only thing that saved me was the logic questions. I guess the test used logic to recognize male brains. So, since I answered all those questions positively it sorta balanced me out. But even with all my logic I was still 1 point more feminine brain than masculine brain. I think it's a silly test. If I had said things like "I laugh at the misery of others" I could have had a man brain.
But anyway, the test lets you have 5 points either way, so I guess that rather than saying I have a feminine brain I could say I have a very well balanced and androgynous brain. I like the way that sounds better.
But speaking of girl brain, I've been treated like a girl lately and it's been weird. The past 5 weeks I've got my date in without asking anyone out. This is the most I've ever been asked out. I now know what it's like to be a pretty girl.
The funny thing is I've been passed around too...and that's just strange.
There was this one girl (hereafter referred to as Girl#1) that liked me. She was very open about it, and she asked me out a few times. On one of those activities (a group date) I met her roommate (girl #2). Now, my good friend is infatuated with girl #1 so I couldn't do anything about it without breaking trust. And to be honest, I couldn't get myself excited about her regardless of how perfect she seemed. So, after a while I guess she gave up...but that opened me up for the roommate. Anyway, last night I was asked out by the roommate. I was just tossed around. I hear that happens to girls sometimes, but it's never happened to me...and it felt strange. When she asked me out I said "so wait...is girl #1 coming?" She said "no, it's just us, it will be a date. Is that alright?"
Anyway, that's the next reason I'm feeling sorta like a girl today.
Oh, and a funny thing, yesterday was my roommates birthday. We went out with two girls in our ward to get shakes. When we were there one of the girls looked at me and said "you know what, if you weren't a member of the church you'd be a druggie."
Believe me, this came out of the blue. I asked her why I'd be a drug addict and she said "well, you just have that sort of personality."
I have no idea what this means. Does she mean I'm irresponsible? Does she mean that I don't have any self-control? Am I unambitious?
I doubt I'll ever figure out what that means...but I should probably drop the idea cause I'm sure I already put more thought in her statement than she did making it.
Oh, and funny thing. I'm in class right now and this girl just raised her hand and said "I can talk about having a double life. When I'm at home we don't watch pg-13 movies. But when I went away to school I started watching pg-13 movies. So now when I go home it's weird cause I can't watch pg-13 movies there, and I feel like I have a double life."
Isn't that awesome?
In other news I think I might be too competitive. I played racquetball last night and I realized I have a problem. I haven't played for about a year, and I went with people who play weekly...so I figured that I better work hard. My problem is this...I get so focused I stop having fun.
When I was a kid I'd do this. Any time anything involving competition came up I'd get tremors in my hands, my heart would beat fast, and I'd I'd just clear my head and think about nothing but winning. I rarely had fun but I always won. As I grew older I realized I had a bit of a problem and I worked at fixing it. Here's an example...
A few years back I went on a date at a game center. I knew I had (have) a very unattractive competitive side, so I let that go and I let her win. I felt like this was a big step for me...Iwas making progress as a person...I was letting someone else win.
But the problem was she started to rub it in. She'd say "you beat me at this and this...but I can always beat you at air hockey." I let her win a few more times but she became more annoyingly cocky. I eventually snapped. We went on another date to play air hockey and it was a shut out. She didn't score a single time. I had the tremors come back, I lost the smile, I just won. It's not very fun to play this way. I need to figure out how to play hard and have fun. Maybe someday I'll learn how to strike that balance. I think I'm getting better.
Here is an anecdote from a even father back. I remember in 4th grade we used to play handball. I would practice all the time and I got really good. The way the game was played was you'd play until you were beat and then you'd go to the back of the line and wait till it was your turn again. I used to start playing at the beginning of recess and then play the whole recess cause no one could beat me. Of course, kids would get annoyed (and I was never a gracious winner) and eventually they'd make me lose. It was so frustrating. They did this through cheating cause the person at the end of the line was the judge of who won the game. After a while the line judge would say I'd lost even when I'd won. This drove me crazy. I was a pretty sincere kid and I couldn't understand lying yet.
Anyway, last night I did something similar playing racquetball. We played 8 games, I won all 8. Regardless of who was on my team. But I think I took the games too seriously because I sure got injured.
I was hit by the racquetball 5 times! I was hit by a racquet twice.
One of the hits was right in my chest. It hurt pretty bad. I have a huge mark on my chest. It looks like I got a hickey from Mick Jagger (disturbing mental image I know).
Here, this makes it even worse....
I would post pictures of my injury but I'm trying to keep this blog modest. Maybe I'll post a picture later....nah, probably not. Putting shirtless pics of oneself on one's blog is a line that once crossed....one can never go back (way too much "one" in that sentence). Well, just take me at my word, it's a funny looking mark.
Well, I think I'm done blogging for today. I hope you're all doing well.
1 comment:
That picture: priceless.
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