School

Well, back to school. This semester is a really weird one. It's actually sorta poetic...I'm taking my first semester of college over again. You see, 10 years ago I had just graduated from high school and I was hired on at Sav-On Pharmacy. I worked more than 40 hours every week....and I really didn't take school seriously...so, I stopped going to most of my classes about half-way through and focused on my job instead. This of course led to a horrible semester...so now I gotta retake those classes cause if I don't I won't graduate with high honors, and it's a shame to do extremely well for 5 years and then blow everything with 1 bad semester. So, now, 10 years later, I'm retaking those classes, and that's why this semester is sorta poetic--you know, ending where I began and all of that.

What's really funny is that (because I'm retaking my first semester) I have classes like "Intro to Philosophy." I mean, I have my degree in philosophy completed and I'm taking a class with this description: "for non-philosophy majors who have no previous experience studying philosophy."

Oh well, it's going to be interesting. I've actually audited a class from the professor before so I know him a little. What's funny is that he starts all of his classes the same way. He begins by saying, "before we can discuss philosophy, we must first understand what philosophy is" and then he asks the students for their definitions. Every time someone offers a definition he says why it's wrong...over the course of 3 class periods he exhausts all possible wrong answers and then wows the class by stepping in and sharing the carefully worded definition that he's worked on over the past few years. But, since I'd heard the lecture before, I knew exactly where he was going...so when he asked for a definition of philosophy I recited back to him his own definition (the one we get to end the topic on day 3 (I had memorized it because I thought it was a good one)). After I answered I felt kind of bad cause I realized that I'd messed up his lesson plans for the next 3 periods...or, at the very least, I'd taken away the punchline from day 3.

I could tell he was sort of annoyed, it was like I told the last part of a joke first. Oh well, I'll keep my mouth shut in the future.

Then, to make things even worse, after the class was over I headed over to the elevator to go to the philosophy study room....which is where the professor's offices are. As I got in the elevator, the professor whose lesson I had just hijacked stepped in. I could tell he was still a little annoyed with me, but he didn't say anything.

Anyway, as we got in another guy stepped in too...this guy had a huge cast on his leg. The elevator doors closed and we started our ascent...but stopped just one floor up (on the main floor). The guy with the leg in his cast started to walk out, but before he left I said "geez man, just going up one floor? You should use the stairs next time." I thought he'd catch on that I was joking (I mean, he had a huge cast on his leg, it seemed pretty obvious)...but the guy just got uncomfortable and he said "oh yeah, sorry about that, I will next time."

Man! that guy got me so good, he took a harmless joke and turned it on me (accidentally--but he still turned it) and made me look like a total jerk...and right in front of the professor who already was annoyed with me for ruining his lesson.

Next I went to an Intro to Sociology class. This is a freshman course with about 110 students or so. As usual on the first day the professor started to go over the syllabus...and man he was sloppy. This guy had typos everywhere...and he just couldn't connect his sentences very well. His writing jarred against my brain...it made me squirm like I do when someone is singing off pitch or scratching a chalkboard.

Anyway, after about 10 minutes of this I had had enough. He had a particularly nasty sentence that ended with "and I will help you open your eyes, see that things aren't what they seem, and I will help you see that some of your opinions are wrong."

At this point I couldn't take anymore. I raised my hand and said "not to be confrontational or critical, but could you give me an example of a wrong opinion."

He ranted something off, but I think he could tell from my face that I wasn't buying it...so after class he asked me what I didn't understand. I told him, "It's not a matter of understanding you, I just think you used the word 'opinion' incorrectly. You said that some of us students have 'wrong opinions.' An opinion can't be wrong because an opinion is an assertion made about something with no clear answer... An opinion is either good or bad, but it can't be right or wrong...facts are right or wrong....So, you can either say you will teach us that we have our facts wrong, or you can say that we have bad opinions, but you can't say that we have wrong opinions."

The guy was really good about everything and he nodded his head and said "I never thought of that, thanks, I'll fix it later." I'm just really lucky that he's a humble man, cause I think I would have been annoyed if some punk kid corrected me like that (especially some punk kid in a freshman level course)...but I at least had the good taste to not correct him in front of everyone...and he did ask me for clarification after all. To be honest, I only spoke out cause I was planning on dropping the class... but since the guy was so gracious I think I'll stay.

So, school is off...and, as usual, I've made some horrible first impressions. In one day I managed to make 3 different people uncomfortable, awkward ,and annoyed. I really need to work on my first impressions. But, on the bright side, when you're like me and you make horrible first impressions, it doesn't take much to impress people.