Today's post is on fear (I started this post months ago but never got around to finishing it).
First I'm going to find the best definition for the word. Next, in typical sacrament talk fashion, I'm going to discuss that definition and its implications.
The OED defines fear as "The emotion of pain or uneasiness caused by the sense of impending danger, or by the prospect of some possible evil."
Now, evil is an often misunderstood term, most people think of evil as something moral, but the comprehensive sense of the word includes anything bad, ranging from adultery to tornadoes. However, since most people think of evil in a strictly moral sense, I think a better definition for fear (and the one I will use in this post) is "The emotion of pain or uneasiness caused by the sense of impending loss."
Anyway, does this definition work? Well, if someone is afraid to skydive they are afraid to lose their life, if someone is afraid of spiders they're afraid they might get bit and lose health. If some guy is afraid to ask a girl he can be afraid that she'll say "no" and he'll lose confidence, self-respect, or whatever.
Basically, at the heart of fear is the possibility of loss--in every example I can think of. Sometimes it's not direct. I don't think anyone says before a car hits them "ahhhhh I'm afraid to lose my ability to walk," but I think, underlying the more immediate sensation of danger (as is part of the OED definition) is the possibility of loss.
So, taking fear to be rooted in the possibility of loss what can we say about our own personal experiences with fear?
Well, first off, I think nearly everyone experiences fear...and if you don't there is something wrong with you...cause if you don't feel fear, that means you 1) have nothing to lose 2) don't value what you have to lose or 3) are crazy.
Different philosophers have discussed fear at great length. Socrates viewed fear as part of courage. He argued to Glaucon that if you don't feel fear you can't possibly be brave. One definition of bravery given in his dialogue with Glaucon was someone who knew what to be afraid of and what not to be afraid of.
Nearly all the philosopher's take on fear was that it was something that tempers us. Some say it makes morality possible (the fear of punishment) others say it makes it so we can survive together in groups (e.g. Hobbes who thought that fear of death led us to create government to protect us).
However, I think the best discussion of fear was Aristotle's. He said that fear is necessary, but it must be moderated...we can't remove fear from our lives, but we can learn to control it. As we properly respond to fear we develop a habit of strength, as we succumb to fear, we develop a habit of weakness. Good and bad habits of action are the essence of character (this is actually an interpretation of Aristotle more than a reference to him...but I digress).
Anyway, my main point is that fear isn't bad, it's just a recognition that you have the possibility to lose something you value. What makes fear bad is when it holds you back from doing the right thing, or it holds you back from taking an opportunity that could bless your life.
I think that's the big problem with fear...how it takes away opportunities, how it keeps you from getting the most out of life. But that's not necessarily fear causing the problem...it's responding poorly to fear that's causing the problem. And, like most things that can hurt you, if properly channeled, it can help you (as Aristotle said) temper your soul.
And really, this is what's important. Think about it. Virtue is made possible (or at the very least strengthened) by the sense of loss. For example, if someone gives a gift that costs them nothing most people don't think much of the gift...but compare that to the story of the widow's mite...she gave nearly everything and that made her gift greater than the offerings of all the wealthy men visiting the temple that day. Heroism is a similar thing. A hero's accomplishments are impressive when he kills a dragon or faces an army or something (often fatal endeavors)...if all a hero had to do was click a button to save someone's life we'd just say "yeah, of course, thanks for pressing the button, but don't expect me to name any of my kids after you or anything." It's the possibility of loss (or actual loss) that makes many actions praiseworthy.
First I'm going to find the best definition for the word. Next, in typical sacrament talk fashion, I'm going to discuss that definition and its implications.
The OED defines fear as "The emotion of pain or uneasiness caused by the sense of impending danger, or by the prospect of some possible evil."
Now, evil is an often misunderstood term, most people think of evil as something moral, but the comprehensive sense of the word includes anything bad, ranging from adultery to tornadoes. However, since most people think of evil in a strictly moral sense, I think a better definition for fear (and the one I will use in this post) is "The emotion of pain or uneasiness caused by the sense of impending loss."
Anyway, does this definition work? Well, if someone is afraid to skydive they are afraid to lose their life, if someone is afraid of spiders they're afraid they might get bit and lose health. If some guy is afraid to ask a girl he can be afraid that she'll say "no" and he'll lose confidence, self-respect, or whatever.
Basically, at the heart of fear is the possibility of loss--in every example I can think of. Sometimes it's not direct. I don't think anyone says before a car hits them "ahhhhh I'm afraid to lose my ability to walk," but I think, underlying the more immediate sensation of danger (as is part of the OED definition) is the possibility of loss.
So, taking fear to be rooted in the possibility of loss what can we say about our own personal experiences with fear?
Well, first off, I think nearly everyone experiences fear...and if you don't there is something wrong with you...cause if you don't feel fear, that means you 1) have nothing to lose 2) don't value what you have to lose or 3) are crazy.
Different philosophers have discussed fear at great length. Socrates viewed fear as part of courage. He argued to Glaucon that if you don't feel fear you can't possibly be brave. One definition of bravery given in his dialogue with Glaucon was someone who knew what to be afraid of and what not to be afraid of.
Nearly all the philosopher's take on fear was that it was something that tempers us. Some say it makes morality possible (the fear of punishment) others say it makes it so we can survive together in groups (e.g. Hobbes who thought that fear of death led us to create government to protect us).
However, I think the best discussion of fear was Aristotle's. He said that fear is necessary, but it must be moderated...we can't remove fear from our lives, but we can learn to control it. As we properly respond to fear we develop a habit of strength, as we succumb to fear, we develop a habit of weakness. Good and bad habits of action are the essence of character (this is actually an interpretation of Aristotle more than a reference to him...but I digress).
Anyway, my main point is that fear isn't bad, it's just a recognition that you have the possibility to lose something you value. What makes fear bad is when it holds you back from doing the right thing, or it holds you back from taking an opportunity that could bless your life.
I think that's the big problem with fear...how it takes away opportunities, how it keeps you from getting the most out of life. But that's not necessarily fear causing the problem...it's responding poorly to fear that's causing the problem. And, like most things that can hurt you, if properly channeled, it can help you (as Aristotle said) temper your soul.
And really, this is what's important. Think about it. Virtue is made possible (or at the very least strengthened) by the sense of loss. For example, if someone gives a gift that costs them nothing most people don't think much of the gift...but compare that to the story of the widow's mite...she gave nearly everything and that made her gift greater than the offerings of all the wealthy men visiting the temple that day. Heroism is a similar thing. A hero's accomplishments are impressive when he kills a dragon or faces an army or something (often fatal endeavors)...if all a hero had to do was click a button to save someone's life we'd just say "yeah, of course, thanks for pressing the button, but don't expect me to name any of my kids after you or anything." It's the possibility of loss (or actual loss) that makes many actions praiseworthy.
When my brother was about 10 or so he somehow came upon 20 dollars...all the money he had in the world, and of course at this age the money was burning a hole in his pocket. He kept on thinking of all the things he could buy with the money. Whenever we were at a store he'd always point at something and then calculate how many of them he could buy with his small fortune. Anyway, one day I mentioned how I was a big fan of Pez candy. When I said this my little brother took note, and a few days later, when I came home from work, I found a huge bag of Pez sitting on my desk (it took me weeks to eat it all). He'd gone to the dollar store and spent his entire fortune to buy me candy. It was one of the kindest things anyone has ever done for me.
So, tying all this together...I think facing or experiencing loss makes or strengthens virtue, and because fear is the psychological pain brought on by the sense of impending loss, fear is closely tied with virtue...but to what extent I can't really say.
All I know is that some of the greatest things I've ever done were the result of me facing my fears, and some of the worst moments of my life have come from succumbing to my fears. When I went on a mission I was scared to death. I didn't know if I had a testimony, I didn't know if I had conviction, I didn't know if God even wanted me to go. When I got on that airplane my feet felt so heavy, it was one of the hardest things I've ever done...but I can't begin to describe how much that decision has blessed my life. Similarly, I think back on times when I've let fear overtake me...like when I didn't tell someone how I felt because I didn't want to get hurt, or the time when I was in guitar class in high school and a kid was getting teased for having bad acne and I didn't step in and defend him cause I was afraid to reprimand 4 seniors as a freshman (next year I broke out really bad and that was probably karma)....these were times that defined me as a person...for better or for worse, and these character defining moments were given weight (or more accurately, were made possible) by fear.
Anyway, that's about all I got to say on the subject. I wish I could offer some wise advice on how to conquer fears, but I don't think there aren't any quick fixes where fear is concerned. So, since I can't offer a solution, all I'm going to try to do is offer some perspective.
Here are two points that might offer some perspective:
1) When you're afraid you can at least be excited because you have something to lose. Only someone who values nothing can be free of fear, so by feeling fear, you can take heart that you have something of value (sorta convoluted logic I know).
2) If fear comes from a sense of impending loss, and fear prevents you from acting when you should (causing you to miss out on an opportunity or something i.e. experience loss) then succumbing to fear actually brings about loss (which is the cause of fear and the very thing you're trying to avoid). So, by succumbing to fear, in a weird way, you realize your fear.
So, while I can't present any solutions, I can at least say that, rationally, it is better to face your fears
(this is of course when your fear isn't reasonable (if you're afraid to go to Spain and participate in the running of the bulls I think you should listen to that fear))
than to succumb to them because running from your fears causes you to lose out on some of the sweetest experiences in life, and that is something to be afraid of.
All I know is that some of the greatest things I've ever done were the result of me facing my fears, and some of the worst moments of my life have come from succumbing to my fears. When I went on a mission I was scared to death. I didn't know if I had a testimony, I didn't know if I had conviction, I didn't know if God even wanted me to go. When I got on that airplane my feet felt so heavy, it was one of the hardest things I've ever done...but I can't begin to describe how much that decision has blessed my life. Similarly, I think back on times when I've let fear overtake me...like when I didn't tell someone how I felt because I didn't want to get hurt, or the time when I was in guitar class in high school and a kid was getting teased for having bad acne and I didn't step in and defend him cause I was afraid to reprimand 4 seniors as a freshman (next year I broke out really bad and that was probably karma)....these were times that defined me as a person...for better or for worse, and these character defining moments were given weight (or more accurately, were made possible) by fear.
Anyway, that's about all I got to say on the subject. I wish I could offer some wise advice on how to conquer fears, but I don't think there aren't any quick fixes where fear is concerned. So, since I can't offer a solution, all I'm going to try to do is offer some perspective.
Here are two points that might offer some perspective:
1) When you're afraid you can at least be excited because you have something to lose. Only someone who values nothing can be free of fear, so by feeling fear, you can take heart that you have something of value (sorta convoluted logic I know).
2) If fear comes from a sense of impending loss, and fear prevents you from acting when you should (causing you to miss out on an opportunity or something i.e. experience loss) then succumbing to fear actually brings about loss (which is the cause of fear and the very thing you're trying to avoid). So, by succumbing to fear, in a weird way, you realize your fear.
So, while I can't present any solutions, I can at least say that, rationally, it is better to face your fears
(this is of course when your fear isn't reasonable (if you're afraid to go to Spain and participate in the running of the bulls I think you should listen to that fear))
than to succumb to them because running from your fears causes you to lose out on some of the sweetest experiences in life, and that is something to be afraid of.
3 comments:
People fear pain and discomfort. What are they losing in these cases? They lose their ability to be pain-free? Or they lose their accustomed level of comfort?
I agree with your definition in principal however in this application it seems like a stretch.
I would probably think of it in terms of things being better before the pain or discomfort. Since pain and discomfort make things worse, there is a loss of some type. I think it's better to look at things (when we're speaking of fear) at a personal level, so it's how things affect you, not necessarily what they are.
I chose to look at it as me gaining pain. So I fear gain in this case ;)
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