A Letter to "Nice Guys"

Hey Nice Guys,
I'm not sure if I'm one of you. I just thought I'd write you a letter since I've met a few of you the past few days. I'm kind of sick of you "nice guys." I have no problem with genuinely nice guys...I'm really only writing to the annoying ones that deserve sarcastic quotation marks. Anyway, here's my problem with you.

You really think you're so nice you deserve a girl out of your league. Just a few days ago a guy came up to me and started telling me his "nice guy" past. From our conversation I could tell he thought he was remarkably witty, deep, thoughtful, everything a girl could want, but sadly, he was just under-appreciated by the opposite sex. This whole mindset gets on my nerves. I have nothing wrong with thinking you're special, but I do have a problem with thinking that you're a bed of gold waiting to be sifted or some other pretentious nonsense. If girls aren't interested in you, it's probably your fault. I am pretty sure that girls judge character far better than most "nice guys" give them credit for. If they can't see your tremendous innate worth...it might be because you're overestimating yourself. I can objectively estimate most "nice guys" since I'm an outside observer (and I'm most definitely not biased by appearance) and I can honestly say that on average, when I meet one of you "nice guys," I find your skill in conversation, wit, thoughtfulness etc. to be about as impressive as the girl who turned you down last Friday.

Now, as for your claims that women aren't attracted to you because they are shallow and judge your appearance...all I can say to this is be thankful you're a guy cause guys do this to girls far more frequently than girls do this to guys. Take a look at the girl that isn't really all that interested in you, view the situation objectively...and then face the cold hard truth that she is probably way too attractive for you. Since she's out of your league I'll give you a few options to make it work out....

1) Accomplish something (medal of honor works well)

or

2) Make a fortune (not saying she'll marry you for money, but money is definitely a good incentive to look past your looks).

Also,please keep in mind your hypocrisy. Although you're a "nice guy" who thinks deep and interesting thoughts you're most likely (despite what a "nice guy" you are) interested in her because of her appearance. What your problem is is that you feel you deserve to date out of your league because you're so spectacular in so many unquantifiable ways that only your mother is aware of. Come on now, be honest, if the girl was hideous she'd be grateful for your deep, thoughtful, and romantic gestures. The problem is you feel a sense of entitlement.

Now, I'm not saying I'm not a hypocrite, and I'm also not saying that I've never caught myself thinking "man, if only she can see what a great guy I am." I think that's natural. My big problem is when you're one of those guys that has cried on my shoulder in the last few days (4 of you to be exact) who thinks you're just under appreciated. Honestly, you're not. Man up, get realistic.

Hopefully this message doesn't sound harsh. I guess I'm just fed up with hearing sob stories. I wish you all the best...remember that just because a guy is good looking and charismatic doesn't mean a girl is shallow for liking him. He very well could be those things in addition to his being more witty and thoughtful than you. Don't blame him, blame your parents.

Good luck, have a great life, cancel your World of Warcraft account, and hit the gym.

Oh, and portions of this post might also apply to "sweet girls" but I'm not qualified to make that judgment.